Friday I slept in through my biweekly therapy session and I was so mad at myself…

Then I couldn’t sleep last night…

Or tonight, obviously, but I’m manic and agitated, confused, sad, hurt and more that’s just causing me a lot of emotional distress 😭.

So a few years back my best friend was nasty to me and I responded with a fabulous HUGE, Bipolar freak out.

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Yes my diagnosis has been officially changed with trying to update my medications which was… well a hellish 2 month struggle, that I’m still working with.

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So now when we hang out my friend is so…well…surfacy…like won’t seem to get to emotionally close to me.

People around us refer to it as “Jenna’s freak out” but it really pisses me off that he admitted to being asshole to me first and being nasty!!

No one fucking cared!

Just moved to to the next conversation.

So to recap he approached me…made a nasty, starky comment to me…and my response was explosive because instead of listening to me he just assumed what he heard from the other person was the truth.

So instead of blocking him (I can’t because if my other friend needs us together I want to be civil) I just muted him.

Let’s put it this way…if I forged that relationship with him while living here, that is the only relationship that would make me think twice about moving to Orlando.

But I have been trying for about 4 years now and I now live 15 minutes away. Nothing.

Oh….I’ll share…my best friend was my brother.

I don’t talk to him anymore. As of tonight I am done with him.